This weekend.
This weekend was by far one of the best weekends I’ve ever had. I’ve gone through every single emotion you could think of; happy, sad, angry, stressed, loved, bored, contemplative. You name it, I experienced it.
- Friday night/Saturday Morning: After my rant about my shit day, night brought me amazing things. Daniel and I stayed up really late. Amazingly late. We talked of everything. Friends. Love. Sex. Camp fires. We giggled. We giggled like there was no tomorrow. “This is what being high feels like, Sam. Take this, bring it up a notch. And this is it.” And it was amazing. I don’t even know what made us laugh so hard, so much. I suppose that at 6am, everything starts to get funny. Then we fell asleep. Both of us. Together. It was this…really weird thing. I almost never fall asleep like that. But. I just got into bed and passed out, with no problem. It was truely amazing. I woke up, and you weren’t there. But it’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with that.
- Saturday afternoon: He came around at 2pm. After he had woken up. I somehow managed to wake up at 11am. I’m not sure how. We talked of everything, as always. But today was a little slow for us. Maybe it was just awkwardness of the night before. It’s not everyday you fall asleep with a close friend like that. We got over it and talked about last night. The campfires. The love. The sex. The friendships. We talked of more. I don’t understand how I could possibly talk to someone so much without getting irritated at them. But I manage it. I manage it well.
- Saturday night: I went to Dave and Buster’s. Waste of money, only because I don’t have a job. I mean, it was fun. But I wish I would’ve saved my money. I played House of the Dead 4, and I had a huge group of people watching me in amazement. I died a few times, and I ran out of coins. So some guy, a rather attractive guy, put some of his own in for me. I was quite flattered, he seemed entertained by me kicking zombie ass. I finally beat the game and the same guy was like, “That was epic!” and he joined me in for another round. He reminded me of Kohl, somehow. Looked a bit like him. Talked like him. Didn’t quite sound like him. But same concept.
- Sunday: I was stressing the fuck out all day. I had an essay due for AP English the next day, and I just started. Not only was an essay due, but 50-70 notecards with citations were due. I was terrified as shit that I wouldn’t finish. I mean, I was already really far behind. But I managed to deal with it.
- Sunday night/Monday morning: I couldn’t fall asleep, when I was about to, Daniel texted me and woke me up. So I decided to go talk to him instead, after I finish up my essay. I finished it. It took me ten hours, and I plan on doing some more with it at school. Daniel showed me his new hair cut. And …oh my God. I could seriously not get over how amazing he looks with it. Not only that, but I’ve never realized how golden his eyes are. They’re beautiful. After swooning about his hair forever, he said, “Enough. Just tell me I’m hot already, and get over it.” Somehow, confidence built up in me at that instant, and I said, “Daniel, you look really fucking sexy.” We joked around about it for a while, and he showed me this video on Youtube I’ve seen a million times. My New Fuckin Haircut. Later on, he called me cute. I was baffled. But I said, “I’m not cute. You’re cute. I’m just lame.” and he said, “We’re both lame.” I got to thinking about how lame I was and pointed out to him, “Daniel, I’m awake at 3am, on a school night mind you, talking to you.” And what he said freaked me the fuck out. I had no idea what to say. But regardless, “It’s because you’re in love with me.” I was sitting there thinking, This again? How do we always get into the conversation of us being in love. We’re not. I don’t think we are. I mean. A crush, maybe. But… But I let my mind stop wander. No need to think about that now. We’ll leave it as what it is for the time being.
Still no Dani around. My girlfriend. My “girlfriend”. I think I’d just consider us done for, considering by the time we talk next, it’ll probably be the “we need to talk” speech. And she’s probably going to say something along the lines of, “This isn’t working out. I’m sorry. We don’t talk enough. I feel bad for leading you on by saying you’re my girlfriend when we never speak to each other.” I guess we’ll have to wait and see. I can’t even remember the last time I’ve spoken to her. But I see this coming. The whole…break up deal. Maybe I won’t be upset. It’s hard to miss someone who was never there in the first place. And plus? I think I’m falling for someone. As strange as it seems.
